Sometimes I fantasise about having a year off, well more like a year of NO. And It looks a little like this……
Work, school and home.
That’s it! No homework, no sport, no before school activities, no after school activities, no birthday parties on the weekends OR during the week, no instrument lessons…………. Nothing but working the hours needed, being at school for a standard day and the rest of the time is spent at home.
No committees, no P&F, no dinners you don’t want to go to, no family commitments that aren’t going to be fun, no additional study. A commitment by everyone to be at home, together for a whole year!
I imagine the stress level would be minimal, the kids would spent significant less time being taxied around in the car. There wouldn’t be hours of hair pulling, teeth grinding (by me) trying to get the kids homework done.
No more “QUICK get dressed were going to be late”.
Dogs would be played with, bikes would be ridden in the street until dinner was ready, grass would be rolled on and fallen leaves would be collected. Just time off from the crazy schedules we have created for ourselves.
I have a friend who has a brilliant expression, when she uses it, it resonates deep with me “stop the world spinning, I want to get off!” This always makes me think, is that even possible??
We are the master of own creation. We create our busy world. We create and foster our kid’s worlds. What if we stop. Say no, What would happen??
I am the first to admit I over commit, I do it every year. I end the calendar year vowing to take on less next year. But by March, my plate is full, the kids are hectic and I think, crap I have done it again!
So I am going to make a change.
This year is what it is, I am committed and will follow through with what we have signed on to do.
However I am going to start planning my 2016 year now. I am going to sit down and write out what outcome I want to achieve and make a plan for it to happen.
I will sit with everyone as a family and ask them how they are feeling about how much we do, I don’t think I have even asked the kids. Usually something comes up and they get excited, I signup and pay and off we go, a new activity!
Everything we do impacts on each other, this intricate web needs to be well thought through.
I know I can’t say “No” to everything. It’s unrealistic. But I don’t think it’s unrealistic to cut just a few things out. It should, hopefully make a big difference.
To work out what we can cut out, I am going to:
• Create a list of EVERYTHING we do.
• Then I will prioritise this list – what must we do, what should we do, what do we want to do and what can we take off?
If we’re not giving something our full attention, or it is burden on our time, it has to go!
I’m hoping we will have a clearer picture of how our time should be spent and give us a better outcome for the use of our time in 2016.
But I feel like I need to easy the pressure for us now and there is a change I can make immediately. I am going to make Sunday Family Day, absolutely no commitments, events or functions. This day is going to be 100% family. It can be spent at home vegging out, it can be out for lunch, going to a movie, anything we want. As long as it’s just us, I don’t care. I just need to get used to politely declining any invitation that comes our way for a Sunday! Sunday is our day.
We all need time away from our busy worlds. Time to take a breath and gather yourself. Holidays are few and far between for most of us, we need to take time out, relax and recharge.
Taking control can be hard, finding the time to even stop to look at what’s on our plates seems impossible. But the idea of wanting things to improve should be motivation enough to make some changes.
I hope you have a lovely week.